Multiple sclerosis profoundly impacts the couple and the relationship with the partner. Faced with the challenges of the disease, the partner often becomes a precious ally, sometimes a caregiver, always emotional support. Why not turn this alliance into an opportunity to get closer while taking care of your respective brains? Training together in cognitive stimulation can become a beneficial and pleasant couple ritual that strengthens your daily bond.

MS in the couple: challenges and opportunities

The arrival of multiple sclerosis in a couple often disrupts the established balance. Roles may change, new concerns arise, and the relationship dynamics evolve. These changes can be a source of tension but also of new depth in the relationship if the couple finds ways to navigate them together.

Chronic illness affects both partners, not just the diagnosed person. The partner also lives with MS: concern for the future, adapting to fluctuating symptoms, sometimes the role of caregiver that adds to that of a partner. Recognizing this impact on both members of the couple is essential to preserving the relationship.

Challenges to overcome together

• Fatigue and availability: Fatigue associated with MS can reduce quality time spent together, limiting shared activities and moments of intimacy
• Role change: The partner may gradually become a caregiver, altering the couple's dynamics and sometimes creating an imbalance in the relationship
• Difficult communication: Difficulty talking about fears, needs, frustrations without hurting the other or feeling misunderstood
• Uncertain future plans: Uncertainty related to the progression of the disease can complicate joint projection and long-term plans
• Social isolation: The couple may withdraw, gradually losing social connections and outside activities

Opportunities for closeness

Paradoxically, the disease can also strengthen the couple's bond. In the face of adversity, some couples develop increased complicity and solidarity. The disease invites us to review priorities, to appreciate simple shared moments, to communicate more openly about what really matters.

Why train together in cognitive stimulation

Cognitive stimulation does not have to be a solitary activity. Practiced as a couple, it can become a pleasant sharing moment that benefits both partners while strengthening their bond. It is a concrete way to do something together that makes sense for each other's health.

Benefits for both partners

Cognitive stimulation is not reserved for sick people. The healthy partner equally benefits from exercises to maintain brain health, especially as they age. Training together, both members of the couple take care of their brain health and build their cognitive reserve for the future.

For the partner, it is also a way to take time for themselves while sharing a moment with their partner. When caregiving, one tends to neglect oneself. Shared cognitive stimulation allows them to take care of their own health while assisting the other.

A daily moment of connection

Sharing an activity, even a few minutes a day, nurtures the relationship. EDITH and JOE's cognitive exercises can become a couple's ritual, a pleasant moment to look forward to. Laughing together about mistakes, celebrating successes, challenging each other: so many small moments of connection that strengthen the bond daily.

Better mutual understanding

For the partner, participating in cognitive stimulation helps to better understand what their MS-affected partner is going through. Observing difficulties and progress helps to develop empathy and better assist daily. It also helps to become aware that cognitive impairments are real, not imagined or exaggerated.

Since we do EDITH together every evening, it has become our little moment. My husband understands my difficulties better by seeing concretely what troubles me. And I am less embarrassed by my mistakes since he makes some too! We laugh a lot and it really brings us closer.

Véronique, 54 years old, MS for 12 years

How to organize training as a couple

Choosing the right time together

Identify a time of day when you are both available and relatively in good shape. It can be in the morning when you wake up, after dinner, or before bed. The important thing is regularity and that this moment suits both partners. Avoid times when one of you is too tired or stressed.

Defining the modalities that suit you

• Side by side: Each does their exercises on their device, at the same time, in the same room. You share the moment while progressing at your own pace.
• In turns: One does the exercises while the other observes and encourages. This mode allows exchanging and commenting on performances.
• Friendly competition: Compare scores on the same games to gently challenge each other. Be sure to keep a playful and supportive spirit!
• Collaboration: Think about responses together, help each other with difficult exercises. Perfect for couples who prefer cooperation over competition.

The valuable role of the partner in cognitive stimulation

The partner can play a very positive role in the cognitive stimulation process, provided they find the right balance between support and respect for autonomy. Here are the different ways to support their partner.

Pitfalls to avoid

• Do not infantilize: Avoid monitoring, correcting, taking control. Your partner remains autonomous in their approach.
• Do not compare: Avoid remarks such as "you should have done better" or "it's actually easy".
• Do not insist on bad days: If your partner is tired or unwilling, respect them. Stimulation should remain a pleasure.
• Do not dramatize difficulties: If your partner struggles with certain exercises, remain calm. It doesn't mean the disease is worsening.

We are both over 60 years old and have been using JOE and EDITH for a year. It has become our evening activity, after the news. We gently challenge each other, comment on our mistakes, and laugh a lot. It gave us a new shared activity and really strengthened our bond!

Jean-Pierre and Martine, 65 and 63 years old

Couples' testimonials

At first, I did my exercises alone, and my husband didn't really understand the interest. Then I suggested he try with me. Now, he's the one reminding me when I forget our evening session! He says it does him good too and that he feels closer to me.

Émilie, 39 years old, MS for 5 years

My wife has had MS for 20 years. We've been through a lot together. When she started EDITH, I wanted to accompany her. We do that together every morning now. It's our little ritual, our moment before the day begins.

Bernard, 67 years old, supporting partner